Sunday, April 6, 2008

Magnetics in the Toilet and Missing Greek Mythology Papers

Our youngest daughter, whom we often refer to as Nappy (short for Napoleon -- she's quite a dictator, although not a very successful one), has, of late, been spreading her wings. Her most recent outstanding accomplishment was climbing into her wheelchair, but the list goes far beyond that.

She has also discovered the joy of pulling step stools where 'ere she wants to climb. This new freedom and confidence is great. However, it's leading to some fairly easy to solve mysteries.

For instance, Swimmer Girl (my nine year old) had spent a week writing synopsis of information on various Greek Gods and mythology about them. A week. For her, that's a significant chunk of her lifetime. The papers, which were kept on her desk, are now no where to be found. Needless to say, she wasn't happy about going back to the drawing board, and I'm still not sure where they went, except that I suspect a cute little blond girl toting a step stool may have had something to do with the disappearance.

Not long after that we had the "mystery of the missing bracelets". My poor persecuted Swimmer Girl could not find her bracelets that she had left on the dining room table. Oddly enough they turned up under the table cloth, near Nappy's seat. Again, I can't be certain, but I believe this was a crime branded with a capital "N".

Then, there were the magnetics in the toilet. I saw them as I was about to lift her onto the toilet.

"Hey," I observed, my Sherlock Holmes nature shining through, "There are magnetics in the toilet! How'd those get there?"

Totally innocent blue eyes, eyes wide with shock and horror, looked back at me.

"I have no idea."

"Did you put them in there?"


I called to whatever kids were nearby and all but my 5-year-old princess came in. I looked at the 4 of them. The truth was fairly obvious.

Looking at my 11, 10, and 9 year old, I said, "Well, I know it wasn't you, you, or you... so you all can leave."

Nappy looked at me. I said, "It's pretty obvious isn't it."

"Yes," she replied, eye lashes batting. "It must be ****." Of course, blame the sister!

I called our princess in, and asked her what she knew about it. Nothing. I looked again at Nappy.

"Sorry mommy, I think it was me that dropped them in the toilet."

"Why?" I asked. I'm a glutton for punishment, so I always ask that question. Really, I understand that there is no reason why. But, somewhere, deep in my heart, I just have to believe that children do have a reason for what they do.

"Because." She responded.

"Not good enough." I said, "Why did you drop the magnetics in the toilet."

"Mom," she sighed. "You know...." She looked at me, pursed her lips and shook her head. "It is what it is."

I had to ask, didn't I? I hoped that perhaps a natural consequence would drive the point home. Unfortunately, having her retrieve them didn't produce the repentance I had hoped. There was no sadness about sticking her hand in the toilet -- only mild curiosity and something akin to.... pride?

"Guess what guys!" she told her siblings, "I stuck my hand in the toilet and MOMMY told me to!"

Ya, right. Show me a Dobson book that addresses a kid like that!

No comments: